Things are pretty much the same around here. Stephen has pretty good days then decides to scrap it all and end up in his room for hours on end.
Last week I had to keep him home from school. It was a simple case of him not getting ready to leave. The new rule is that he has to be dressed, his room clean and in the car by 8:50. That is the latest I can get him to school without being late. Tuesday that didn’t happen.
That day I had Stephen assigned to do several restitution projects around the house. I messed up by giving him the long list of things to do. Weed the front flower bed, mow only the outside edge of the yard (the parts I can’t get with the riding mower), pick up misc. stuff in the backyard, and clean out my car. Now that may sound like a lot of work and it is. He owed Mark the weeding project for being disrespectful the day before. He owed me 3 jobs for not being ready for church, etc. He kept me waiting on three different occasions.
Stephen started out gung-ho..he worked diligently in the flower bed for maybe 30 minutes. As he slowly lost foc us, he got discouraged. He then decided not to do any work and spent the rest of the day in his room.
About 8pm I asked him again, about being ready to work. He agreed this time to start mowing. I allowed him to mow until 9pm. The problem is that he piddled around and didn’t start the mowing until 8:30 and it was almost too dark by that time.
In my attempts to get him to do the work I made a threat I wasn’t willing to follow through on. That is a big mistake on my part, I know. It is just so hard to keep my mouth shut!!! I told Stephen that he had to finish all the work or he wouldn’t go to school the next day. Remember that Stephen loves school (who wouldn’t with a slave driver like me!). Anyway that didn’t motivate him as much as I had hoped on Tuesday. I suppose he knew I probably wouldn’t follow through. You see as much as I want to teach him to obey and be ready on time, I really hate for him to miss class. He only goes half a day and I think he needs that instruction time. It is obviously a bigger chore for me when he is home as well, but really and truly that wasn’t my motivation in this case.
When Stephen went to bed Tuesday night, I reminded him of my (empty) threat. I think he was defeated by that point realizing he couldn’t get it all finished before class.
Wednesday morning I woke Stephen up at 6:15am. He layed around for 15 minutes and then much to my surprise he can in asking to work. I told him it was possible to get all the work finished if he really put his mind to it. He had approximately 30 minutes for each chore. It was possible but not likely to happen. Stephen is a good worker when he wants to do something, but he is never fast.
He worked in the flower bed for 1 hour. He worked steadily but not at a rapid pace. At 7L30 I told him he could start mowing. At 7:50 I decided he had made a very good effort and so I took him to school with a promise that he would need to finish the work after class. Stephen made good on his work but it did take him two more days to finish.
In the last week we have been opening our pool. What would normally be a 1 or 2 day project turned into a week long project. Thanks to help from my best friend and her husband, we were able to put in a new liner and get the 12 year old pool up and running again. It took some doing..let me tell you. Putting in a liner is no easy thing. It isn’t perfect but it will work. Hopefully we will never have to do that again. This liner was only 3 years old. It should have lasted 7-10 years. The problem is that we ‘cheaped out’ when we originally put it in and didn’t put anything between the liner and the concrete foundation. That combined with pool chemcial mixes in the water caused the liner to erode too soon. This time we put foam padding under the liner and switched our chemicals to salt water. So far things are working marvelously!
We are now at the end of a three day holiday weekend. We survived with only a few casualties. Saturday our friends came over to swim and cookout. We had grilled chicken and corn on the cob. Stephen made it through most of the afternoon but then ended up being sent to his room. He had to eat dinner alone and missed out on a movie.
Sunday we didn’t have any company over. Church went well then we watched the Indy 500 and waited in vain for the Coca Cola 600 which ended up being rained out for that day. Stephen was able to participate in all activities all day long.
Today the kids and I went to the Old Fort Days Rodeo Parade. Stephen went along but mostly seemed bored. Makenna (my friend Angie’s daughter) went along as well. We had a good time then came home to cook burgers and hot dogs on the grill. The rest of the Smith family joined us to swim and eat. Despite the occasional rain showers, the kids had a great time in the pool. Angie and I got to visit while the guys watched the NASCAR race that ended up being rained out more than half way through. Stephen was able to stay on track all day today as well. It was a nice holiday. I am thankful for that.
I am sitting outside on the patio blogging and getting eaten ALIVE by bugs so I guess I will sign off. School will be out soon and we’ll be spending mega time in the pool. One because I love summer and the water, two because we really need to conserve funds. The less driving we do and the more we stay home, the cheaper we can be! Of course that will also mean lots and lots of time at home with Stephen. I am trying to come up with unique ideas to keep him busy. We managed last summer but I didn’t really have RAD training until mid August so I wasn’t as strict on him as I am now. Though I had hoped to be a little further along by now, I am still proud of his progress. I now know what he can do, it is just a matter of what he is willing to do that determines how much fun his life can be.
Love ya, stay in touch. Any ideas, please send comments.
Kim
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